Today, I want to talk about assumptions. Assumptions are part of our daily life, and they can happen at any time. We make assumptions off the biggest and smallest of clues, and they can largely depend on our mood at the time. While they can be harmless, they can also lead us down a path that is challenging and confusing if we’re not careful. A very frustrating things about assumptions is how unintentional they can be. Without meaning or trying to, you can assume the worst, and that can change the trajectory of your day. But in the past few weeks, I’ve learned a few lessons about assumptions, and I’d like to share one today.
For the past few weeks (actually, months), I’ve been going through a move. This is not a unique process by any means but as many people know, it’s quite stressful. The organizing, packing and unpacking is one thing. But dealing with the emotions of leaving an old place or going to a new one can bring a lot to the forefront, which can make it difficult to get things done.
There’s an assumption I’ve often made about big moments in life, especially when it comes to change. My feeling has always been that I need to wait until I’m “done” with the moment to feel the emotions from that time. In the past, it’s helped me prioritize what needs to get done stay present. But it’s also come at a cost; when I finally let myself feel my emotions, it’s a floodgate of all types of feelings coming from every angle. Oftentimes, it was the parts after a transition that were most challenging to me.
So being in the middle of a period of transition, I felt like I was at this familiar crossroad once again. But this time, things felt different. With helpful encouragement and reminders from the people who love me, I did my best to address the feelings as they came up. If I needed a moment to feel sad while I was packing, I took it. If a few tears escaped when I was trying to get something done, I paid attention to my body and took some time. Rather than force everything down, I tried to address my feelings in moderation. I couldn’t always fully embrace these feelings, but it helped a lot more than burying it deep down.
I know advice to feel your feelings isn’t very original but right now, it feels revolutionary to me. Compartmentalization is important but sometimes, ignoring our feelings does more harm than good. In situations like this, figuring out your own timing and order of things is important. At the end of the day, how a person handles these transitions is up to them. I’ve learned that when I challenge my assumptions, there is room for growth, and I am better set up for the next change coming my way.
Now, I want to hear from you! Have you discovered anything new about yourself from periods of change or transition? Let me know in the comments!