About Carl

I’m Carl Davies, a 56-year-old expatriate French teacher from the UK who has lived in the UAE since 2003.

What was the major turning point in your recovery from having a stroke?

Having recovered well in hospital, I felt ok as I was discharged but while home alone, it hit me. I felt bereft, utterly bereft. I was grieving the old me. I was angry. Why me? I felt I was a burden to my loved ones. But then I had an epiphany. I’m literally not dead, “perfectly imperfect”, as my wife would say.

Time to start to love and embrace the new me and use my stroke experience as a force for good and change. To this end, I’m now an advocate for men’s wellbeing and would like to offer some form of coaching / mentoring in Abu Dhabi.

What are some things that really helped?

• I journaled from early on in my recovery. Not to log physical progress but more for my emotional progress. Just writing down how I felt each day was immensely cathartic.
• Traumatic brain injuries lead to heightened emotions, although I’ve always been a heart-on-sleeve guy. So, talking to my wife and close friends, tears and all, offered the occasional release.
• Changing the narrative from stroke victim to stroke survivor. I had survived a massive brain bleed. Some parts of me were not working but these were temporary imperfections.
• My new mantra is to not let the stroke define me but refine me.

What advice would you give to other stroke survivors?

• If you are a stroke survivor, recovery is slow, and sometimes you just have to work hard on it and, as I did, take the small wins when they come.
• For any blokes not in a great headspace right now, small wins are just as important. Can you go to bed tonight feeling 1% better than you did 24 hours previously? What good things happened today?
• Look around at what you have. Life may be throwing you a curveball right now but are you loved? Wife? Kids ? Mates? The odds are you are loved and they probably love you unconditionally.
• Self care, self love is essential. Do something for you every day. Take a walk in nature, treat yourself to a nice dinner. Go for a good massage. Indulge yourself. You have earned it.

Carl’s book, Stroke Me! My Road To Recovery, is available on Amazon.

– Carl Davies, Abu Dhabi, UAE
@strokeme_1969 | Carl Davies